Setting the Scene

It’s not like since him I haven’t been attracted to other people.  Oh no.  I have been attracted to a few people.  There was the ADHD riddled, Jewish, swimmer who made me laugh, made me feel safe and gives the best hugs.  He distracted the crap out of me and as soon as I realized that every attempt I made to study with him (+/- his shirt) was a complete disaster, I exorcised him from my life.  There was the Eton bred, unbelievable conversationist whom I convinced to get back with his girlfriend.  As a psychiatrist if I charged per hour for our sessions, I would have been able to afford all those dresses I ignored as a medical student.  Seriously, we had a four-hour daily commute on the northern line, and then the Piccadilly line and if you didn’t know any better (and a lot of people didn’t…) you would have thought we were an item.  But no, I was just the Band-Aid.  I refrained from touching him in any capacity.  Did I mention he is now engaged to aforementioned lady?  Well, the date is set.   

I leave an entire paragraph free for a breed of boy that I had never before I left Mr Continental Drift.  I like to call them the NCBs aka Nice Christian Boys.  If you have ever been ensnared by one of these well-meaning creatures, you may have experienced full on Nice Christian Boy Syndrome, or NCBS for short.  With non-Christian boys, it is clear when flirting is flirting and when it isn’t.   They are in a word, intoxicating.  You know how girls complain that the guy was shallow, there was nothing in his eyes but lust etc.  These guys are lit with a fire that is super natural.  They quite literally have God on their side.  It doesn’t even matter if they are hot (in the traditional sense) or just good-looking or whatever.  They are presentable, polite and passionate about God.  If you don’t know what I am talking about, you really don’t know what you are missing.  Now, the problem with the NCBs is that an unsuspecting girl could get carried away and may have fashioned a whole grand romance in her head about her relationship with one of these chaps when in reality they are just. Being. Nice.   I learnt the hard way, and maybe I lost my way afterwards, then I learned and stopped paying attention to them altogether.  Maybe that is why my girlfriends all pretty much settled down and I ended up with a closet full of wedding outfits. 

It’s amazing how 8 years can fly by like that because I am now back where I started and alone.  I make friends, and they leave or I leave.  I am planning another grand escape to an even further continent than before and if I do, what will happen to my singledom?  Will I meet my fella and be forced to stay (she says smiling) or will I make more friends, yay! And be forced to leave again before I know what I am doing?  The latter is highly likely albeit not inevitable.  Give the girl a chance.

I left out a fairly prominent character in the debacle thus far.  The long timer, or as I like to call him, my American.  We have known of each other since I daresay conception… and have been circling each other and avoiding doing anything crazy our entire lives.  There was one year when I threw caution to the wind entirely and kissed him, repeatedly which he ruined by attempting to get ‘fresh’.  That was a bad idea because if I remove that incident from our history then I could at least say that I handled the entire affair well.  He is short, and he is short sighted like I am and although these are not no-nos are far as I am concerned, I like seeing whether he has grown up every time I say this to him.  He used to defend it outrageously before but now I don’t know.  I haven’t seen him since I showed him my favorite place in the world and he managed to complain the entire time as well as attempt getting ‘fresh’.  I was genuinely holding out an olive branch and he was being American.  My knowledge of men other than gay men is very limited.  I am what is considered a ‘good’ girl, ahem, and as such I can’t read him too well.  Lets just say that after that and other instances where he burnt olive branches, I have laid him to rest.  As a matter of fact he isn’t even a friend on Facebook.  When I am literary and prominent, he can find out through his brother (a friend on Facebook) how I am if he’s interested.  Dear gentlemen, if he had been even the tiniest bit romantic I may view him in a better light, I mean he got a free tour of the Southbank at dusk… that is my signature move!